Monday, December 14, 2009
So I’ve made an executive decision….since getting in the mood does me little to no good, I’m getting into the spirit….specifically the Christmas spirit. From now until Christmas, as the spirit moves me, I will slaughter traditional Christmas stories/songs for my amusement. Tis the season for the truth…
Twas the night before a Fatty Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the house, the fatties were stirring popping seams on their blouse.
Their stockings were hung by the new Frigidaire, in hopes St. Nicholas would be bringing eclairs.
Then what to their sugar filled eyes did appear, a miniature Santa and eight plus sized reindeer.
A skinny ass Santa, what a cruel trick, they knew in an instant he must be a dick .
As reindeer go they pretty much sucked, listening to him shouting knowing they were fucked.
Up to the housetop the reindeer did fly, sucking, tucking holding onto their thighs.
Down the chimney he came looking so mean, dressed in all fur like a Santa Drag Queen.
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work, rationing candy like a fat ass jerk.
And laying his finger deep inside his nose, he reached for a buggar as big as a hose.
I heard him exclaim as he hid it from site, “Merry Christmas Dear Fatties and to all a good night!. “