Thursday, April 25, 2013
Since I’ve typed a word on this blog. Paralyzed by grief I suppose. I’ve thought of funny things to share and hoped they would bring me back to blogging. Just knowing you wouldn’t be around to call and tell me how funny I am stopped me every time. You don’t realize how much you appreciate something until it’s not there. I have shit to say. And it needs to be said. And I WILL say it again. I can feel your disappointment in me. I let the blog sit for a year. This Sunday we will celebrate your life on the day of your death. I am prepared to make you a promise. To let go of what’s keeping me from moving past my grief and begin to do what you wanted me to do so badly…be famous. Oh and rich. So I could support you of course. Guess I’ll have to take care of Mama Quita and Dotty now that you have gone to Heaven. I’ll make sure Mama wants for nothing and Dotty has that reading machine you wanted her to have. The best money can buy. I’ll even take her to see the drag queens and make sure she has that paper bag stash of vodka that made you laugh so much. It was that simple your eyes. “Write and you will be rich Homey. You are so fuckin funny.” Everything was cut and dry. Just do it. Don’t take no for an answer and don’t make excuses. If you’re out there reading this…remember….each day is a gift. Appreciate everything often and always. Find pleasure in the little things. Surround yourself with great people and live each day as if it were your last. I always thought that was cliche…until 04/28/2012. Now it’s the rock on which I build every minute of every day. I have to remind myself to enjoy everything and worry about nothing. What’s meant to be is meant to be. God says who. God says when. No amount of anything changes that. Make great memories and smile often. Control what you can control and let go of everything else. Wasted time is a wasted life. I will be back soon with something funny to say. In fact I already know what it is. You’ll just have to stay tuned. For now…we celebrate my #1 Fan…my Homey….my SIF…Mrs. Tara Burlage. My love always Homes. I miss our runs, our wine and our dance parties. Esposa still can’t dance. Hell, you couldn’t either. Thank God I have soul. See…that was funny. True but funny. XOXO SIF